Eclectic Lesson

Slightly Strange 101 | February 14, 2011

I got my first name from my father and my middle name from my great-grandfather. Those two were not related, by the way. My mother just liked to mix up names from both families.

My great-grandfather was a former journalist, turned businessman.
I found out about his newspaper when I was about 17 years old. Before then, I suppose I had never thought about his past life, as if he had been an old man all the time.
This man had accumulated great wealth in his life but dressed simply and behaved modestly. It was the rest of the family who were all pretentious and vain. He passed away a few years ago, and I felt sad but did not cry, for he always felt so distant to me.

My father is also a modest guy. He’s a man of few words, so I’ve never been able to know his view of the world and his life in general. I just suppose things haven’t turned out the way he planned. Sometimes I think about people I know and the amenities and luxuries they have, and I get jealous for not matching their wealth. But then I think about my father and remember the virtue of humbleness. Besides, I believe he has the right to live a good life, and I don’t think he deserves any of my arrogant demands.

I am twenty-one years old. I have a mild obsession with time. I hate waiting and wasting time that could otherwise have been spent on productive affairs. I tidy my desk every time I feel I have too much time on my hands, and I do my laundry when I get bored. When I stay indoors on weekends I get the feeling that I age twice as fast, and that my old self would kick my ass for wasting my youth. My personal philosophy is that I’ll have nothing to look forward to when I get older, so my present duty is to seed the memories that will keep me going later in life.

Friends have called me cynic, apathetic, self-centered and rude. Ex-girlfriends have called me bitter and arrogant. Relatives have called me calm and collected, stating that I am “a bit of the silent type, like my father”. Up to this day, I don’t know which description, if any, is the most accurate.

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